Back to work - and now everybody but AJ has a certificate to say we've all seen a forklift.
Monday: Cousin Elli didn't come in to wake me at seven Saturday and Sunday, but I didn't get to sleep in anyways because I woke myself up - I knew she'd woken up and was trying to be quiet so she didn't wake me, and for some reason that meant I felt I had to get up too.
We went out Saturday and walked around the center, ate lunch and went to see a movie, then Elli wanted to get some groceries to take back with her as she can't get all the Indian and Chinese things you can here. She bought a lot of stuff and I did my own shopping for the week too, so we loaded it all in the car and got it back OK - apart from a 2 litre pack of cola, which decided it didn't want to come with us and made a break for it. Elli said there's something wrong with the car, there's a hissing noise in the back, but I said no, I don't think so - then the cola made it's move.
Sunday we just stayed in and talked, and Elli used some of the things she'd bought to fix lunch and dinner for us, so I ate well again. I didn't have any cola that evening, so had to made do with bourbon and water instead. I woke at seven again on Monday - I guess I'm getting used to it. We wasted the day talking, and I finally persuaded her to stop helping me tidy up, so she took over my kitchen and fixed lunch for us instead - I've been eating well for four days now. She finally left at four so she'd get home in daylight, and I gave up and got ready for work. Getting up at seven made me so tired I went to bed at ten as well, and my body clock's going to need a week to put itself right.
Tuesday: I woke at seven again this morning - and I don't have to get up until eight! I have to be in for half eight, and it only takes me ten minutes to get up and ready for work and either five minutes to drive there or fifteen to walk. I was tempted to go back to sleep but if I did that I'd oversleep and not get up, so I sat about for a while once I was ready and then drove in - the car smelt of cola so I kept the windows open all the way, and it seemed OK by the time I got there.
AJ called us together for the morning meeting as we all weren't there yesterday, and said he'd decided over the weekend to implement an "office management" policy, to follow on from last week's "ergonomic" policy. For a moment I thought he'd realised there wasn't any office management, but it turned out to be just another week where he isn't speaking human again. He wants us all to work in a clean, uncluttered office, and that means no paperwork lying around, no litter, and no ornaments. Amy near had a heart attack right in front of him, but he realised he was trying to go too far too fast and said we all could have non-work related objects on our desks, as long as they were neat and out the way of our working area.
Wednesday: The big printer wasn't working after the lunchbreak again. Walked over, pulled Mike's mobile charger, told him I was getting tired of threatening him with LeeAnn and I'd tell her what he was doing soon if he didn't stop it, and plugged the printer back in.
AJ told Donna the filing room downstairs is looking too untidy, and would she see to it. After he'd gone back in his office, she said OK, who left things lying about in the filing room? We all shook our heads so she said right, and she and LeeAnn went down to see. Donna came back up on her own and said it wasn't anything we'd done at all, it was the Cleaner - they'd left a mop in there. James said what did you do with it? and she said LeeAnn said she'd get rid of it and she's putting it back in the Cleaner's cupboard. LeeAnn came back up then, and said it's OK, I put it out on the shop floor. Donna said oh, I thought you said you were going to put it back in the Cleaner's cupboard, but LeeAnn said no, I said I'd get rid of it.
AJ came around again after the lunchbreak, stood in the doorway of my office, and said there's still too much paper on your desk, and you can't be using all of it. I said it's all pending and there's nowheres else I can put it - can I have a filing cabinet? He stood for a moment and acted as if he was thinking, then said well, if you must keep it on your desk at least try to keep it in neater piles, and wandered off. So that's a 'no, you can't have a filing cabinet' then.
Thursday: We all had our forklift truck awareness course today. AJ was going to attend the first session with Donna, Fiona and most of the Assemblers, so they weren't looking forward to it, but he decided at the last minute he didn't really need to after all. He said he already knew (from experience) that forklifts can be dangerous and he couldn't really spare an hour, so he didn't need to go. Donna said it was quite good and you got a certificate, but Fiona said it was a complete waste of time. I was in the second group with James, LeeAnn, Amy, half the Packers, and most of the Welders, so I was looking forward to it.
The instructor showed us all a video of forklifts moving about and told us all forklifts are a tad bigger than we all are and just a smidgen heavier. LeeAnn leant over and hit one of the Welders who sniggered at that, but he said he didn't mean what she thought he did. The instructor then said they move a mite faster than we all do too - but that could be something to do with the fact they've normally got engines and we all haven't - and so we all should try to avoid being hit by one whenever possible. If they hit you they're very rarely the one that gets damaged.
After fifteen minutes he said well, that's it - I've been told to give you an hour of training, but there's nothing else to say so I'll show you this video instead. It showed several forklifts line dancing to classical music and we all discussed it for a while, then he sat and filled in certificates for us all while the conversation moved on to more important things like who'd done what last weekend, and how on earth the Assembly foreman managed to pick out the winning horse in the sweepstake on the National this year when normally he gets the one that falls at the first fence.
Friday: AJ said at the morning meeting we all need to try harder to keep the workplace tidy, and we all shouldn't have items or posters on the walls as they don't look professional. After he'd gone back in his office, Donna said does that mean we have to take down the copies of the memos on the notice board as well? I said it looks like it, and the new fire drill instructions Andy put up, and the calendars, and the vacation planner.
I then thought about it a minute, and realised 'posters' means those inspirational ones he paid through the nose for as well, and that means I'll have to take down my poster of two morons stranded up a mountain waiting for Search and Rescue. It still doesn't make me think 'teamwork', but I've gotten used to it by now and I'll miss it. I said to LeeAnn that means my poster and all the others, including your tiger one, and she said no way. Fiona said he can't mean those, we paid too much for them. She went in his office to tell him so, and came out smiling to say he says take down all posters except the inspirational ones, and we can leave our individual calendars up too.
AJ walked around before he went to the afternoon meeting at Head Office, and said there's still too much paperwork lying about, everyone get it put away by the end of the afternoon - the office has to be neat and tidy before you leave tonight. We all stopped working and tidied up a little until he'd gone, then left it and just got on with the work. He'll have forgotten by Monday.